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I read somewhere: "The hardest challenge is to be yourself in a world where everyone is trying to make you somebedy else" (E.E.Cummings). This is just such a true statement for me. I tried to fit in, and felt out of place. With the passing years, having experienced lots of unpleasentness I have realized that it is impossible to be happy while trying to satisfy everybody and follow the conventions that don't really agree with me or do not fit in my life. Finding myself still...

Saturday 5 January 2013

Life of Kai

I must say Kai has a character! And oh, gosh what a character! Kai is lovely but very troublesome. He loves walks and absolutely hates cats, and shouts at other dogs of a medium or large size (he does not mind small dogs). Kai is of course a dog - a white german shephard. He has been my dog for 2 years now. Given to me (by my man) as an early birthday present.
From what I know he had had a disfunctional family before he came to us. During his early puppy days he had stayed with a woman, who had loved his looks and constantly washed him to look gorgeous and he had even worn a diamond dog collar (figure a diamond collar on a german shepherd - just no!)! Anyway that does not make it disfunctional - yet. However, Kai had not been walked (as he had no idea how to walk on a lead or stay safe in a street and the previous owner said to us: "He does not like walks, he is not a walker" I could not believe it!), he had done his business in the back small garden and he might have been shouted at for making a mess, as  since he is free to run in the back garden here as well as soon as he did his toilet he wanted to hide it immediately by .... (I won't reveal his menthod of hiding it - yuuuck!). But like I said he loves his walks, loves running and playing and prefers to do his business then. Well, the worst is yet to come. We realized very soon that Kai was really suffering with a pain in his head. He cried at night, his ears were going all floppy (rather than standing), and the next evening he just started banging his head against the walls and floors, causing his skin to break and bleed. We were terrified. (I must admit I thought at first that he was going crazy, which he really was but not with maddness but pain). We took him to emergency vet hospital. He suffered from severe infection in both ears, he had so much discharge that it built up to a horrible crust deep down in both ears. It took two "operations" to remove it - he was put to sleep and stayed in surgery over nights. Between the operations and after them we had to give him ear drops a few times a day, a set of antibiotics and painkillers for a few weeks. It was a long process to recovery - poor thing. So, for the first 6 weeks of his life with us, I had hardly any sleep - staying on the sofa with him, smoothing him and reassuring him all nights. The vets told us this infection must have been very very painful for over 6 months at least! And he was only 8 months old!!! So most of his life - till we got him - he had been in pain going crazy and  never taken to the vets (as it appeared)! We contacted the previous owner to find out more about him and his health history - she was not nice and told us not to bother her as the dog is not her problem. Never got any information. It looks as the previous owner had never been concerned about the dog's health at all, she must have had enough of his cries and therefore got rid of him (even though during conversations with her prior to taking him home, she had told us the dog was in perfect health, and she had only decided to sell him as she was moving house). Well, no more comment about the previous irresponsible owner.
Kai has grown from a very beautiful puppy to a very beautiful adult dog - he is about 2 years and 8 months now. But he can be very naughty. He steals slippers! He is very noisy and pulls terribly when he sees a cat or a dog, making walking him quite a nightmare sometimes - so we normally walk very early in the morning and late in the evening to avoid meeting other dogs and/or other times during the day when I just stay very alert all the time in look out for other dogs to find the way to avoid them (it can be very tiring). One example of a bad walk; happened about a year and a half ago, when I took him for a walk straight after work (before tea) - silly me the most busy time for dog walkers - Kai saw a dog on a pavement on the other side of the street, he pulled hard, and suddenly I fell on the ground in the middle of the street and  Kai kept on dragging me along - just interested in the other dog. I came back home crying with pain and humiliation, covered in cuts and bruises. And to be honest, this was the moment when I felt I had enough and the idea of giving up on him came to me (not proud of it). I felt I could not take it anymore - I felt so powerless - even though we had him neutred his temper towards other animals was impossible to deal with. I am glad I overcame the feeling and did not give up on him.  He is also very badly behaved at the vets, cries, screams and tries to jump at every animal around. Shame, I don't seem to be able to train him to behave otherwise (I think in the end I will need to save up and invest in a proper dog training by a professional dog trainer as he obviously cannot attend classes with other dogs due to his attitude). He is my "stalker" in the house - he follows me everywhere around the house. Always by my side, he acts totally heart-broken if he cannot come with me to the bathroom, stays by the door and cries. When I go to work, he stays by the front door most of the time - waiting. He will not touch his food or drink unless I am around. So, every morning, when he gets his breakfast I need to stay with him in the kitchen till he finishes eating as I know he wouldn't touch it again until I return and stay with him. When he lies down by my side, he has a need of touching me - he either puts his head on my feet, or lies so closely that he is actually pushing onto me. I know german shephards choose one person in a family as his owner  but it really surprises me just how much he is dependant on me.   The good thing is he gets along so well with Storm - our (my partner's really) 9-year old (we think) german shephard, but it has not always been so. Kai and Storm now form a pack and like to stay in each other's company and guard the house together. Kai is just so friendly to us and to our friends and so playfull! He lets himself being cuddled by my daughter like a teddy and he always sneaks into her room when the door is open to steal either one of her slippers or a toy to make her chase him.
I love my dog! Even though he still behaves like a spoilt child in need of constant attention.

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